1. Don’t leave, put your mate out, or break up before you’ve gathered all the facts.
If you leave your spouse or significant other, put him or her out, you may never get to the bottom of what’s really going on. If you break up without having all the facts about the affair – or at least finding out as much as you can, you’ll never know whether or not your relationship could have been saved. You need certain facts before you can determine the best way to handle the situation. Once you leave or put your mate out, you hamper your ability to gather the necessary information. Being in a position to monitor the cheater’s activities, attitude, the frequency of contact with their lover and other things will give you valuable information about the affair which can help you make an intelligent decision about what to do. . See Should You Take a Cheater Back? – How to Decide and When to Give Cheater a Second Chance.
2. Don’t ignore your mate’s infidelity, thinking that the affair will eventually run its course.
There’s a remote possibility that that could happen, but usually not the case. If you turn a blind eye to the fact that your mate is cheating, the affair could escalate the point of no return. The next thing you know, your mate will be leaving you, asking you for a divorce.
3. Don’t go around telling everybody you know that your partner is having an affair.
There are some people in your life who don’t need to know what going on between you and your mate, if he or she is having an affair. It could come back to haunt you later on in ways you could never even envision right now. Although you need to confide in someone, exercise extreme caution as to who you tell about the affair. See Who You Should and Shouldn’t Tell That He’s Cheating on You.
4. Don’t accuse your mate of cheating unless you have solid proof.
You may have a pretty good idea that your mate is having an affair, don’t confront your spouse or significant other on mere suspicion. And above all, do not ask the cheater if he or she is having an affair. Since lying and cheating go hand in hand, you will not get the truth. The situation will backfire if you don’t really have concrete proof, and you’ll only make a bad situation worse. See How to Get a Cheater to Tell You the Truth about His Affairand 9 Reasons a Cheater Will Lie About His Affair.
5. Don’t waste your time and energy on the “Other Woman” or the “Other Man.”
Forget about harassing, confronting, or blaming the person your spouse or significant other is cheating with. It won’t do you any good. The fault lies with your mate. Your partner is the one who made the decision to cheat. Focus your efforts on trying to get your relationship or marriage back on track.
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Other Articles in the 5 Things Infidelity Series
5 Things about Signs of Infidelity
5 Things About Emotional Infidelity
5 Things about Rebuilding Your Relationship in the Aftermath of His Affair
More Articles with Practical Infidelity Advice
For other articles on dealing with infidelity of all types, see the list below, or visitwww.NationalInfidelity.com, whereyou will find practical, immediately-usable advice from Ruth Houston, an internationally-recognized infidelity expert who has been researching infidelity for over 18 years, and who is frequently called on the media to comment on popular infidelity issues in the news.
*** © copyright 2011 Ruth Houston / All Rights Reserved.
Ruth Houston is a New York-based infidelity expert who is frequently called on by the media to comment on high profile infidelity and popular infidelity issues in the news. She is the founder of www.InfidelityAdvice.com, the author of Is He Cheating on You? – 829 Telltale Signs, and publishes the Infidelity News and Views blog. To interview infidelity expert Ruth Houston, or have her speak at your next event, call 718 592-6029 or e-mail InfidelityExpert@gmail.com
For practical,immediately-usable advice from an infidelity expert who has been researching infidelity for over 18 years, visit www.NationalInfidelity.com, or see the list of articles below.
How to Get a Cheater to Tell You the Truth about His Affair
9 Reasons a Cheater Will Lie About His Affair
Should You Take a Cheater Back? – How to Decide
When to Give Cheater a Second Chance
2 Major Obstacles to Taking a Cheater Back
Is He Cheating on You? – 6 Articles to Help You Understand His Infidelity
The Best Investment You Can Make in Your Relationship for 2011
Online Resources to Help You Catch or Monitor a Cheating Mate
FREE Infidelity Tip Sheets for Men and Women with Cheating Mates