With the abundance of emails received regarding the article posted about single-parenthood, this article will address the relationship topic proposed. The relationship topic proposed was in relation to people who felt they had been misled by persons who were not sincere about what they wanted in relationships.
Without knowing just where to begin in that discussion, this article will address one of the keys to beginning a good relationship with someone. We will refer to it as key number 100!
Key # 100 means that you will always be 100% truthful with your heart and mind correspondence meaning, do not let your mind lie to your heart thus; If someone shows you who they are, do not pretend that you do not see it.
Just what does it mean not to pretend you do not see it well let us examine;
If you are dating someone who cringes when you touch them, someone is emotionally unavailable and the majority of the in depth conversations you have with them seems to focus on things you can do to make yourself good enough for them, it is highly probable that he/she is, “just not that into you!”
If you know there is evidence that supports the other party is not that into you, do not pretend that they really are into you but just want you to be better. There may be some truth to them wanting you to better yourself, but save that for married couples who have more than 5 years together as the request is probably genuine in a marital relationship where love has become the foundation of the relationship.
If you have been dating someone but have not been able to gain any real footing in the relationship, meaning they ignore you so much you cannot even tell if they heard something you said or texted to them, until you got a promotion at work or a new job, do not pretend like you do not see it. More than anything, love should be unconditional. You can only hope that the person you are dating will one day become a part of your family. Ask yourself, would your family treat you differently if you had this or lacked that? The bottom line is anyone who cannot accept you at your worse, for damn sure, does not deserve you when you are at your best! Why not? Because life is full of highs and lows and the next time you are low, you may not have a companion.
If you have just begun to date someone and they are not trying to find their way into your schedule on a daily basis, they are either already taken or once again, “not that into you.” Keep in mind that in combination with other behaviors, the right person for you will find it very hard to see things about you that they do not like. Keep in mind how strongly you feel about them along with how you treat them and compare it to how they treat, respond and interact with you. If the scale has a significant imbalance then you know you are not with the right person.
The majority of married couples will tell you that it was really hard to stay away from their significant other in beginning. They wanted to see the other person daily, they wanted to be around them, they wanted to talk to them, be close to them, get to know more things about them; Couples who did not share this feeling of attachment in the beginning are the 50 +/- percent of persons who are already divorced.
If someone shows you that you are not worth a date, not worth a return text, not worth a phone call back, not worth their time, not worthy of their respect when it comes to other women then show yourself the door gracefully and walk-out of the situation fast before more than your heart gets broken- before your spirit is broken as well.
DO NOT try to figure out what is going on in their mind as that is not your responsibility. It is not up to you to figure out how they feel about you; it is up to them to show you through their actions. Save yourself the heartache by walking away early before you have to rip your heart away because you left too late.
NOTE: Much of key #100 does not pertain to married couples. Married couples have already established a commitment and therefore have different ways of dealing with problems when they arise.
This topic will be further examined in future articles.