We have all dated them. Anecdotally, it appears they are increasing in number. Who am I talking about? Jerks; that’s who. And today, the good doctor will provide a guide on how to identify a jerk early, so as to not waste too much time on this sub-human caste of society.
To begin with, all jerks are narcissists. To them, they are the universe and the universe is them. They are an egotistical, hubristic lot; who believe their pronouncements are visionary and should be unquestioned from the multitudes of common folk (i.e. everyone else who is not them). This narcissistic persona gives context to all jerk-tonian behaviors.
One of which, is that the jerk is uncompromising. Remember, the jerk believes everything revolves around them. Therefore, your suggestions are irrelevant. When the jerk wants to do something, it is their way or no way. In fact, you’re lucky if the jerk was even listening to your idea! An inability to compromise is a sure fire way to expose a jerk.
Secondly, jerks can be overly nonchalant or indifferent. Now initially, this may appear as a good thing. You may even think, “whew, finally, someone who doesn’t get jealous and gives me my own space!” Until time passes, and you realize, they NEVER ask what you’re doing or who you’re with. It’s as if they don’t even care. And, you’d be right; because the only action worth paying attention too is their own. Are you starting to see a pattern here?
Jerks are also quite selfish. A jerk will readily accept the help of others. However, when it is time to reciprocate they become irritated and annoyed. They don’t subscribe to the notion of give and take. Its take, take, take to the jerk. Of course, if a jerk DOES give back they expect a parade with accolade upon accolade showered upon them.
Finally, jerks are condescending. After all, they ARE smarter than everyone else, right? Well, that is their mindset. So, if you offer up an opinion that is in contradiction to their viewpoint, be prepared to be ridiculed with sarcastic barbs designed to make you look the fool.
Look, jerks are interesting creatures. They seem to function in a universe only known to them. It’s best to know the red flags that designate a jerk as to better avoid them. Now Do As I Say!
Do you have a topic you wished to be addressed in this column (by either the good doctor or Dr. Evil)? Or, do you need advice with a relationship concern? Contact me at firstname.lastname@example.org.
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