Here we go again! I’m alone for the holidays, again! It seems as if I’m the one family member that rarely brings home a mate during the holidays. All of my brothers and sisters, except for me, are married. I’ve never been married, but at least prior to the last couple of years, I had a boyfriend to bring home to holiday parties. I’m 35 years old and the older I get, the harder it seems to find a man that I click with. I live in Atlanta and men highly out-number women. When I meet a man, either he’s not my type or I like him and he doesn’t want to become serious – he just wants me to be a “friend with benefits.” I’m not a bad looking lady and I have a lot to offer. I’m well educated, have a great job and I want to be able to give my heart to someone. Maybe I’m just looking in the wrong place at the wrong time for the wrong person. Rachel, how can I meet eligible men in this city full of women?
Well for starters, Lonely, I would not worry too much about having a man at the table for the holidays in order to fit in ….if those married couples are anything like any of the married couples I know, they’re probably going through holy crap behind the scenes. The grass is rarely ever greener, it just appears to be.
Girlfriend, you must learn to cherish YOU in the meantime. Cherish the freedom you have while you have it. Be excited about the possibilities and the unexpected. When you’re ready to accept a good man, one will come, but you must be READY!
The man that you’ve been waiting for will more than likely appear when you’re no longer desperate and are just having fun dating without all those wild and crazy expectations. Don’t size up every man you meet as husband material! Just date for the sake of finding the unexpected.
There is something to be said about the desperate energy that a woman exerts when she is craving a relationship. It is an energy that turns men off.
Men love the chase.
There are so many women in line for the few men that are available, that many men are only going to be attracted to those women who don’t appear to be desperate and who exude love for themselves.
Open yourself up.
Expand your horizons.
Join free sites such as PLENTYOFFISH.COM and LOOKINGFORMYSPOUSE.COM . Take some gorgeous pics … a full head shot … some playful shots and a few provocative shots. Watch as the flirts start comin’ and the men tell you how beautiful you are and that you’re the woman that they’ve been looking for all of their lives. If nothing else, your self esteem will be instantly boosted.
Whether folks like it or not, internet dating is the best way to find a date for older folks in the 21st Century.
It sounds cliché, but join a church group. I know you really want to give of yourself and there are many groups to choose from:
The Finance Committee
The Christian Ministry
The Communications Ministry
The Boy Scout Ministry
The Health and Wellness Ministry
The Men’s Ministry (It’s about time they start letting women in)
Heck, even the Parking Lot Ministry. You’re sure to meet men while standing out in the cold directing traffic and helping to park all of those expensive rides.
Learn to play golf. Boy, this is a man catchin’ sport.
Go to a basketball game. Go to a football game.
Try to hook up with a white boy by going to a hockey game.
It’s all in the numbers my friend. The more you date, the closer you’ll be to finding the type of man that you want.
Send an email to all of your married friends and tell them that it is their duty to introduce you to one of their husband’s single friends. They would love to be able to brag about being the one that helped you find the love of your life.
But, the best way to meet men in Atlanta, is while hangin’ out at the Publix on Camp Creek Parkway. I’ve been told by many a source that single men shop there in droves. So, make sure that when you go to pick up some beef (no pun intended), that you’re lookin’ your best!
Anyway, Lonely, on a serious tip, you need to chill out and enjoy being single. In many cases, marriage and serious relationships bring about a whole new set of problems. If you really want to find a man, you gotta get out the house and do new and exciting things, cause ain’t no man gonna come knockin’ at your door…. unless of course, he’s a bill collector, the pest control man, the cable guy, the UPS man, the alarm system man, the telephone repairman, the milkman … hmmm …
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